Wednesday, October 05, 2011

The Makings of Me: Birthday Edition


Today is my birthday and I feel like sharing.

1. Hi.

2. My name is Jason

3. I like to write

4. I read a lot of books. The last book I read was “Pimp” by Iceberg Slim now my game is extra tight. (I’m just kidding, but, no really!) I am currently reading “Family” by J. California Cooper.

5. Adidas should give me an endorsement deal because I wear Adidas sneakers like I hung out on
Hollis Ave with Run and them back in the day.

6. Nas is the GOAT (I don’t care what you say.)

7. I have a Jack Russell Terrier named Femi Thelonious” Divadog” Kane.

8. I am the most interesting man in the world and an international man of mystery.

9. I want Tamron Hall to bathe me.

10. Rum & Coke is my drink of choice when I socialize. I prefer Appleton rum, if there is no Appleton Bacardi will do, light spirits please.

11. I am fan of confessional poetry and symbolist poetry, so that means when I write poems they are really honest but confusing.

12. I am a certified street geek.

13. I love laughing really hard.

14. My love is a 187 taking you to heaven.

15. I love the sound of someone I love breathing.

16. I once threw a dude off of a roof and when I turned to walk away a random dude looked at me and said “You got the Juice now.” I confusingly shook my head no and the credits started to roll.

17. I couldn’t sleep the other night so my restless ass watched a documentary about the Jonestown massacre and it made me cry. It was 4am. I was alone. In the dark. Crying. I need some help.

18. Sometimes I describe the value of things by people’s varying degrees of success, for instance: If my phone is better than yours I’ll say “My phone is BeyoncĂ© and yours is Latoya Luckett or my car is Aretha Franklin and yours is Fantasia.

19. The last album I listened to in its entirety was Young Jeezy’s “The Real is Back”. Afterwards I felt like slanging out of the trap and holding my block down, but I didn’t do it.

20. I can rap the entire Illmatic album word for word.

21. I am a damn impressive cook.

22. A little known fact about me is that I am a wine connoisseur.

23. When I'm stressed I lie on my back on the floor and stare at the ceiling.

24. I once got a $500 speeding ticket in the mail and when I saw it a little bit of piss dripped out.

25. If I had to choose movie characters to describe my personality they would be: Will Hunting, Truck Turner, Douglass Street, Darius Lovehall and Dirk Diggler.

26. If I had to choose a movie sequence that I would like my life to be like it would be the last ten minutes of Mo’ Better Blues.

27. The older I get the more intolerant I become of certain shit; I’m starting to understand why some older people are so gangsta.

28. I love complete silence.

29. I once saw Mos Def at a random place in Brooklyn and made him laugh. (random stunt)

30. I’m not good at small talk so sometimes I come off as an asshole; it’s not that I am being difficult I just don’t know what to say in the moment.

31. I can be the life of the party or that dude asking questions that creates awkward moments.

32. I’m a third degree black belt.

33. I just lied.

34. I’m too sexy for this post.

35. I just lied again.

I’m done.